Been a bit since I have taken time to jot down some inner thoughts and reflections. When I look at the picture I have chosen of our six kids, I have to say this is probably one of my most favorite. No, they aren't all looking at the camera, or even trying very hard to get a nice picture together. But when I see this one, it makes my heart happy to see the beautiful lives God has put in our home, enjoying the fellowship of each other. Each personality is shown here to me!

Reminds me of how I want to be if God were to take a picture of me right now and post it for the world to see. Would it be a picture of inner joy flowing out because I have left my worries and cares with Him? Would I be happy to have every one see what my heart looks like? Would they see a clear view of what I believe God is to me personally?

I am currently leading a ladies Bible study in my home and right now we are working through Sally Clarkson's book "Own Your Life." It has been very thought provoking for me. Here is something to really thing about...."What might God do through my life, in the power of the Holy Spirit, if I were willing to dream big and believe in miracles? What might He accomplish through me if I would only throw off my cloak of worry and just enjoy the beauty, dance with the invisible music, and celebrate life?" How often to I miss His best in each day because my focus is on all my projects that need to be done, or I'm fretting and worrying  that money wont be there to cover all the many demands of living life? I believe God wants us to live beyond our daily grind and live in His grace of providing for us....living a life that recognizes God for WHO He truly is. It's definitely humbling to look at my life through this lens! 

Take time today to laugh! Be care free with your kids for awhile! For me, I am going to look at the fun and laughter this picture of my kids portrays and take time to enjoy and be thankful for what I have in Christ!

"For the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh 

but have divine power to destroy strongholds.

We destroy arguments 

and every lofty opinion raise against the knowledge of God,

and take every thought captive to obey Christ." 

2 Cor. 10:4-5

So, I am into week 4 of the Bible study I have been participating in on how to mend a wounded heart. This week's challenges have been a huge challenge for me. Its definitely ironic how, when God wants to teach you something specific, He tends to send specific issues to challenge what you thought you had learned:-)
This week, the author, Suzanne Eller, challenged us to evaluate the playground of the mind. What do I spend my time thinking about? What painful situations do I tend to replay in the playground of my mind? Yes, there is a time to work thru the issues of painful situations in our lives but we can't live in those situations day after day. That is the playground Satan loves us to be in because it's there we turn into ungrateful, unsatisfied, embittered, and selfish people. God wants to clean out every area of our lives that doesn't line up with what He knows is best for us.
Neil Anderson in his book, Freedom from Fear, gives an excellent definition of what a stronghold looks like. "Strongholds are habitual patterns of thinking, feeling, and acting that are deeply ingrained in a person's personality. They are similar in concept to what psychologist call "defense mechanisms," which are unhealthy ways of coping with life." Ouch! After reading that, I definitely don't want to live that painful lifestyle and want God to clean out the strongholds in my life.
Another strong statement I read was by a wise woman, Margaret Thatcher. She advises us this way, "Watch your thoughts, for they become words. Watch your words, for they become actions. Watch your actions, for they become habits, Watch your habits, for they become your character. And watch your character, for it becomes your destiny."
Our thoughts are very powerful weapons. God promises DIVINE power to break down the wrong thought patterns in our lives...but we must use it! He won't force us to tap into His divine power but is more than willing to give us the power we need to break down those areas in our thought life that need to be replaced with His truth and grace. God never promised that His way would be easy. But He promised to be with us each step of the way. He doesn't promise that every situation in our lives will be mended and healed but He does promise to be the Healer and the Gracegiver.
One of the biggest things I am learning right now thru this study is this....I cannot take someone else's brokenness personally. That's very difficult! But if I can with God's help, see that in ALL things God has my good and His glory in it all, I can then partner up with God and instead of allowing the hurt someone else's actions toward me to define who I am, I can be a tool God uses to help reach out to that hurting person. Yes, there are times healthy boundaries need to be set in place and that needs to be done but even in that, let God define who you are to Him and don't let the hurt of another define who you are in your own eyes.

Thru my teen years, one of the songs that I wrote out and placed on the back side of my door to my room had these words...

God hath not promised smooth roads and wide,
Swift, easy travel, needing no guide;
Never a mountain, rocky and steep,
Never a river turbid and deep.

But God hath promised strength for the day,
Rest for the labor, light for the way,
Grace for the trials, help from above,
Unfailing kindness, undying love...

Like the rainbow of promise, God promises strength for every day...

His rest is sweet...and His grace and kindness and love are unending. 

" Fear not, for I am with you;

 be not dismayed, for I am your God;

 I will strengthen you, I will help you, 

I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."

Isaiah 41:10

As I continue in my online Bible study, I came across this verse that has become my "week verse" this week. Fear is a word that easily slips into our minds and sometimes we dont even realize that its controlling us. God says to "fear NOT" and gives a reason why, "for I AM with you." He not only is a call away, He is WITH me! 

I looked up the word "dismay" because I was a little curious as to what it really meant. This is what I found - Dismay - to break down the courage of completely; thoroughly disheartened." That put a new "spin" on the meaning of this verse for me. Its so easy for me at least to become "dismayed" especially in light of what our world has become. But guess what! God commands us to "be NOT dismayed" and tells us why, "because HE is our God!" What a comfort that is to a heart that tends to worry and become disheartened. No matter what our government tells us we have the "liberty" to do, God is still in control. And we can claim like Esther in the OT and courageously say, "we are here for such a time as this." We are here to be light to a very fallen world. 

I love the last part of this verse as God promises to strengthen, help, and uphold! Oh the wealth that is in this verse! When I am falling, He is there to strengthen me. When I am overwhelmed by life, He is there to help me. When I feel powerless, His power is there to uphold me!

As usual, the picture I chose for this post, has a special thought with it. The camera couldn't do this site justice. My daughter and I went out to take pictures of this beautiful painting of God's and she said to me, "Mom look at that cloud. There is a little black out line above it (you can barely see it in the picture) and it looks to me like Jesus is sitting on that cloud." I must admit, I thought the same thing. Jesus sitting on the cloud look at me and saying, "I am still in control and love you!" Revelation 14:14 says this, "And I looked, and behold, a white cloud, and sitting on the cloud was one like a Son of man." It was like the Lord was saying to my heart, "I am here, I am in control. Don't be afraid just trust me!"

Just some rambling heart thoughts from me this morning. Pray they in some way will encourage you too!

 "But we have this treasure in jars of clay 

to show that this all-surpassing power 

is from God 

and not from us. 

We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed;

 perplexed, but not in despair; 

persecuted, but not abandoned; 

struck down, but not destroyed."

2 Corinthians 4:7-9 (emphasis added)

I am currently involved with an online Bible study and our current book is by Suzanne Eller, entitled "The Mended Heart." The title itself grabbed my attention. Who doesn't have something in their heart that hurts. I know I have several areas of hurt in my heart, some others know, some only God knows. The verse at the top is one of the verses she references to when she talks about the hurt in our hearts caused by people we love. This verse has been a favorite of mine for a long time but after digging deeper this morning into what the writer of this verse was trying to convey, it means a whole lot more to me!

"Treasure in jars of clay" - Clay jars have little or no value to them. Clay, when broken, is hard to put back together and in my experience of trying to repair something of clay, you can "fix it with super glue" but you can see the lines and if you hold it up to the light, you can see cracks and holes where light filters in. It isn't "perfect" any more! I see that as my life...words people say, or words you long for someone to say to you....both of these chip away at our dream of a "perfect life". Words break that "clay pot" and we try to fix the broken pieces with smiles, or "I am ok" phrases, or thoughts like "i should be able to handle this", or thoughts like "Its only words" I can deal with it. When in reality, when our heart hurts, and we try to put the pieces back together with out the proper "glue", the jar of our hearts falls apart again, and those broken pieces become even more broken. 

Look back at the verses out of 2 Corinthians 4 - there are four "but not" phrases that I see as God's promises. 

• "Hard pressed on every side BUT NOT crushed"
• "Perplexed, BUT NOT in despair"
• "Persecuted, BUT NOT abandoned"
• "Struck down BUT NOT destroyed"

I looked at what Matthew Henry stated about these verses in his commentary of this and this is what he said, "Whatever condition the child of God may be in, they have a "but not" to comfort themselves with."

God does allow things that hurt into our lives. I am far from reaching that point where I can accept without question what He does allow, but this hurting but mending heart loves the "but not" promises of God and like a cracked pot that is put back together by the expert, I want my "cracked heart" to be a something God's Light can shine through and prayerfully, someone else will see God does mend the hurting heart and when His light filters through the mended heart, HIS beauty can be seen.

Hence, the picture at the top means a lot to me too....Its hard to make it out maybe, but that little yellow road sign shows that a curve is coming up. On the road of your life and mine, there are curves, but God has promised to be right there with us! His rainbow is a promise of His love to us! I know I am far from perfect, but with God's "But not" promises, I want to face the road ahead of me, no matter what curves come, and walk beside my Lord.

And just another side note, if you look closely, there is a double rainbow! Its almost like God has a great sense of humor and says, "You forgot my first promise to be with you...here is a double reminder that you don't walk alone!"

This is a verse that I am taking to heart this week. Our world, Christian and non Christian, is seeking for peace in all sorts of forms. This verse clearly states, that only in Christ can you have true peace. 

It's funny how God puts little tidbits of encouragement into your life when you least expect it. Last night, Zach, our youngest, was playing on his dad's phone. He kept wanting to hook the phone up to our speakers so we could listen to the song he was walking around the house humming to. The words to the song he was singing to hit my heart this morning as I read this verse. Hope you will take time to read through the words and let the truths of GOD speak to you heart. My favorite part is the section that says, "Every time I fall, There'll be those who will call me A mistake, Well that's ok, Cause hear a voice and he calls me redeemed, When others say I'll never be enough, And greater is the One living inside of me,Than he who is living in the world."

 "Greater"

Bring your tired
Bring your shame
Bring your guilt
Bring your pain
Don't you know that's not your name
You will always be much more to me

Everyday I wrestle with the voices
That keep telling me I'm not right
But that's alright

Cause I hear a voice and he calls me redeemed
When others say I'll never be enough
And greater is the One living inside of me
Than he who is living in the world
In the world
In the world
And greater is the One living inside of me
Than he who is living in the world

Bring your doubts
Bring your fears
Bring your hurt
Bring your tears
There'll be no condemnation here
You are holy, righteous and redeemed

Every time I fall
There'll be those who will call me
A mistake
Well that's ok

Cause I hear a voice and he calls me redeemed
When others say I'll never be enough
And greater is the One living inside of me
Than he who is living in the world
In the world
In the world
And greater is the One living inside of me
Than he who is living in the world

Woah ohhh ohhhh ohhh
Woah ohhh ohhhh ohhh
He's Greater
He's Greater
Woah ohhh ohhhh ohhh
Woah ohhh ohhhh ohhh
He's Greater
He's Greater

There'll be days I lose the battle
Grace says that it doesn't matter
Cause the cross already won the war
He's Greater
He's Greater

I am learning to run freely
Understanding just how he sees me
And it makes me love him more and more
He's Greater
He's Greater

There'll be days I lose the battle
Grace says that it doesn't matter
Cause the cross already won the war
He's Greater
He's Greater

I am learning to run freely
Understanding just how he sees me
And it makes me love him more and more
He's Greater
He's Greater

Cause I hear a voice and he calls me redeemed
When others say I'll never be enough
And greater is the One living inside of me
Than he who is living in the world
In the world
In the world
And greater is the One living inside of me
Than he who is living in the world

There'll be days I lose the battle
Grace says that it doesn't matter
Cause the cross already won the war
He's Greater
He's Greater

I am learning to run freely
Understanding just how he sees me
And it makes me love him more and more
He's Greater
He's Greater
He who is living the world

Lyrics by MercyMe.

The heavens declare God's glory and majesty...

what am I doing today to declare His glory and majesty? 

Almost 3 years ago, my husband and I and six kids uprooted our life in the city and transplanted it into the country. Some looked at us and figured we were crazy, and there probably was a little truth to that if we want to be really honest! We looked at it as God's hand leading us to a "new country" and "new ministry." As I look back over the past 3 years and all God has done in our lives, I marvel at how much we have grown closer to Him and how our ministry for Him has grown. For our family, it was a huge step of faith to uproot and transplant in a "new country" but God has always been faithful to lead and guide and declare to us His faithfulness in leading us each step of the way.
Currently, I am involved with an online Bible study group and we are working through Lysa TerKeurst's book "What Happens When Women Walk in Faith." As I was reading and studying this morning, I was reminded once again that for a long time. I mistakenly believed that I had to be "perfect" in order to serve God effectively. I had to read my Bible for so long each day, memorize so many verses per week, keep up a spotless image for God, and the list goes on. Now are all those things bad things? Absolutely not! But do I have to "be perfect" in all of them for God to use me? NO! It took me a long time to realize that I don't have to be perfect and live perfect to serve a perfect God. In fact, He loves to use my imperfections and my willingness to share my imperfections to reach others who are seeking Him. Sometimes God has to show us that we have to leave the past in the past and move forward with Him. With Abraham, God asked him to leave behind all he knew and move forward with Him into a new country. Daniel was taken from all he grew up with and thrust into a life he probably wouldn't have chosen. Noah was asked to leave his every day life and move forward in faith and build an ark. In my reading this morning, I came across this statement by Lysa that hit my heart and warmed my insides and confirmed to me once again that God takes us though mountains and valleys to prepare us to do His work in His time. Her statement was this..."Blessed are the transparent, for they shall be used by God in a mighty way!"
What does it mean to be transparent? I looked up that word in the dictionary and found it to be so convicting! Transparent- having the property of transmitting rays of light through its substance so that bodies situated
 beyond or behind can be distinctly seen.

That is exactly what God desires us to be...transparent...letting HIS light transmit thru us,

so that those behind or ahead of us can distinctly see Him! He longs for us to be like His Son,

Jesus, and let His light shine in us. Will we be perfect? NO! Can we use our failures to still 

transmit His light? Absolutely! He is faithful and just to forgive our shortcomings and is still 

there to walk with us and help us learn, change, and grow!

Abraham, Noah, Daniel, you, me - none of us are perfect while living in this sin filled world. BUT just as these men shined for the Lord where He put them, so can we!

Walk with the King today....and Be a Blessing!

"Therefore do not throw away your confidence, 

which has a great reward. 

For you have need of endurance, 

so that when you have done the will of God 

you may receive what is promised."

Hebrews 10:35-36

Confidence - full trust; belief in the powers, trustworthiness, 

or reliability of a person or thing.

Endurance - the ability or strength to continue or last,
especially despite fatigue, 

stress, or other adverse conditions; stamina.

Promised - something that has the effect of an express assurance. To assure (used in emphatic declarations).

Hebrews 10:35-36 are some verses that I have been pondering as I seek to deep my faith walk with God this week. I specifically underlined some words that we probably know in our mind what they mean but often I find, from my own experience, don't truly take to our hearts the full meaning of each word. 

I want to pull this verse apart this week and see how it can be personally applied to our daily walk with God.

The first part, "Therefore do not throw away your confidence, which has great reward..." I remember a long time ago, my dad would say, "When you see the word 'therefore', you need to find out what it is 'there for'!" So, I took that advice and looked into the previous verses to find out what it was 'there for' and this is some of the observation I found. In verse 32, the write commands the reader to recall previous days of when you endured struggles and hardships and faced public exposure. He then reminds them that they had compassion on those who were in prison because of the gospel. He reminded them too that they held things on earth loosely knowing their where their true reward is...in Heaven. Now that we have looked at previous verses, we need to see the command of the writer, "Therefore, DO NOT throw away your confidence, which has a great reward..." In my reading of these verses, here is what I see....Look at where you have been and what you have learned. Now look to today and its struggles and disappointments. DO NOT let today's struggles take away your confidence in who God says He is. Reminds me of the song, Count Your Many Blessings....GO AHEAD!!! Name them one by one...and it will surprise you what the Lord has done!

I purposely chose the picture at the top as it reminded me of the fact that even in life's storms of fear and doubt, God's light and direction and promise remain the same. The sun shining through the storm is like God shining through my life storm and your life storm. 

"Therefore, DO NOT throw away your confidence...." Satan the deceiver wants you to and will test you at every point to see whether or not you will obey this command....

 Confidence - full trust; belief in the powers, 
trustworthiness, or reliability of a person or thing. 

Put your confidence in God that He does hold your hand in whatever you face today!